Wednesday, 7 December 2016

Midweek Tease ~ 7 December 2016: Night Ride


Welcome to Midweek Tease. A weekly blog hop aranged by the lovely Angelica Dawson, where amazing authors share a snippet of their work. It may be from something completed, or a WIP. Please follow the links to read everyone's offering. And remember, a comment is encouraging to a writer, it means so much. I have a small snippet this week that continues on from last week from my WIP Night Ride. Enjoy.


The carriage felt hot and sticky, being filled with strange bodies cramming, and rubbing against Madison. And the air , thick with a raised level of voices, seemed to be louder than usual tube train chatter. Even the swoosh of the doors opening and closing at stations seemed louder. She could barely hear herself think. The tube train jerked and jolted as it rattled along the ageing rails. Madison wondered why they always had the crumbiest trains running at night , that always felt like they could break down at any moment "I hope I can find a seat soon too," she replied with a strained laugh, as she struggled to keep a grip on the rail.

Suddenly, the train gave an alarming jolt and Madison lost her balance and grip on the rail, falling forward and almost onto the ginger haired man's lap. Her scarf caught on something, and Madison heard a tearing sound... Her coat fell open, and her white silk shirt gaped as she leaned toward him, part revealing the curve of a breast. Madison desperately, with arms flailing, tried to grab onto something so as to steady herself. This ended up being the man as she came to a rest part sitting on his lap, his big black coat rubbing against her stocking clad legs and causing her skirt to ride up a little.

"Well hello there again. If you had wanted to sit on my lap you only had to ask. It's not the best of pick up tactics, but seeing as you're here, I'm Bryn, what's your name?" His eyes wandered to the gape in her shirt, then averted them quickly, hoping she hadn't noticed.

"Madison. And I'm so sorry. I'll move."

"Well it looks like you've lost your rail. So you may as well stay here, and chat with me for a while. That is if you don't mind. I'd be glad of the company."

"On one condition. No talk of work. I've had a hellish day."

"Deal."





16 comments:

  1. What a fun scene! Wonder what they'll be talking about!

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  2. I hate crowded trains. Glad her new friend was there to catch her. Great tease.

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  3. I applaud her aplomb with dealing with the latest in her frustrations. Great tease, Naomi. :)

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  4. Great tease, and I sense the start of something interesting :-)

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  5. That sounds like a reasonable request. Great tease. Love the serendipity.

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  6. Wonderful characterization! This sounds like a fun read. :)

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  7. Ahh, if only such things happened more often on the Tube, it'd be a more fun place to be! :)

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    1. It certainly wood, thanks for commenting Lucy

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  8. I wish my subway rides were as exciting!LOL Great snippet!

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