Sunday 20 November 2016

Weekend Writing Warriors ~ 20 November 2016: The Locket



Welcome to Weekend Writing Warriors, the weekly hop for everyone who loves to write! Every Sunday wonderful authors post eight to ten  sentences of their work. Please show some love by following the links and reading. Comments are always appreciated.  My snippet this week carries on my WIP, The Locket with a bit more from George and Beth.

Weekend Writing Warriors

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George sighed, and sank heavily into a chair opposite Beth. He shook his head slowly, scratched it, however his few remaining white hairs barely moved. Finally, he said, “She looks lovely. Oh Jake, Jake, you're my son and I feel so responsible for our rift. Why didn't we put our differences behind us? I hope it's not too late.” Then he smiled up at Beth who seemed to be searching in her purse for something.

She handed him a two small pictures of her daughter. “Here, you can keep these, and I will bring Chloe here to meet you very soon.”


That would be wonderful, thank you, but pick your time wisely, don't upset Jake.”

23 comments:

  1. That final line, along with the fact that it was Beth and not Jake who reacted, really makes me wonder what he thinks of this scene.

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  2. All will become clear. Thanks for your comment Ed

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  3. "Don't upset Jake"

    That is an interesting thing to say. Nice hook, Naomi, I am dying to know more.

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  4. "Don't upset Jake"

    That is an interesting thing to say. Nice hook, Naomi, I am dying to know more.

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  5. Julie Evelyn Joyce20 November 2016 at 14:39

    I'm intrigued by that final line too. Looking forward to reading more and learning more about these characters. Great work, Naomi!

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  6. That last line really made me wonder as to the nature of their disagreement!

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  7. I wonder what it would take to upset Jake... ;)

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  8. Very emotional and well portrayed.

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  9. Families are always difficult. So what's with Jake? Is he beyond help with so much going for him?

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  10. These snippets are painting an interesting picture of Jake without ever bringing him into the story. I'm curious as to how it will all work out.

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    1. There's quite a lot going on in this story. Thanks for your comment Jessica

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  11. Like the others, I'm wondering about Jake. My first thought was why not upset Jake. Maybe he needs a kick in the pants. But then I wondered why his father was so concerned about not upsetting Jake. Great job on making me want to read more.

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  12. Looking forward to reading more of this story. Intriguing snippet.

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  13. Maybe Jake needs to be upset a little. Or maybe Jake needs to stop being so upset over everything...

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I long to know what you think. So please leave me a comment